I have mental compulsions - Exposures don't work for me

Nate! You keep talking about stopping all compulsions. But, I don't think I'm doing them. It's all in my head. I don't wash my hands. I don't tap. I don't ask for reassurance. I don't go back and check something. I'm doomed, this doesn't apply to me.

I can't even tell you how many times I've heard this from people. It's a very hopeless feeling. But let me tell you this. Even if you're not doing physical compulsions that we can't all see, it's likely you're doing mental compulsions.

Now, when we think about compulsions, we often think of these physical behaviors like washing your hands repeatedly or checking to make sure the stove is turned off. But did you know that there are also mental compulsions? These are compulsive behaviors that happen inside a person's mind, and they can be just as distressing and time-consuming.

Mental compulsions can take many forms. For example, someone with OCD might have an obsession about their own morality, and they might compulsively check their thoughts or feelings to make sure they're not having any "bad" or immoral thoughts. Or someone might have an obsession about being contaminated with germs, and they might compulsively review all of their actions to make sure they haven't come into contact with anything dirty. They may not even wash their hands if they do, it's just the overthinking and problem solving.

Individuals can have solely mental compulsions which many call "pure O" or "pure OCD". They can also have a mixture of physical compulsions as well.

These mental compulsions however, can be really tricky to deal with because they happen inside a person's mind, and they're not always obvious to other people. But just like with physical compulsions, the more a person engages in these mental rituals, the more they reinforce the obsessive thoughts and the harder it becomes to break the cycle.

Well, what do we do about these mental compulsions. First, you'll have to get really good at recognizing them. The biggest thing to do is pay attention to how you're thinking. Natural thoughts happen all the time...but that's what they are... thoughts. They come and go. It can be interesting, boring, or fun. You don't care if you stop thinking about them.

A mental compulsion, are thoughts of course, but with a purpose. Here are are few to recognize if you're doing:

Checking thoughts: Repeatedly analyzing one's own thoughts or feelings to ensure they are "correct" or "appropriate."

Mental reviewing: Going over past events or conversations in one's head to make sure nothing was done or said that might be harmful or offensive.

Counting or repeating: Repeating certain phrases or numbers in one's head to reduce anxiety or create a sense of order.

Reassurance: Having to tell yourself that you're okay over and over again. Problem solving and trying to use logic in order to alleviate anxiety.

Mental blocking: Trying to suppress or push away intrusive thoughts or images, often leading to an increase in their frequency or intensity.

Neutralizing: Attempting to mentally "cancel out" or undo a thought or action that is perceived as negative or unacceptable.

Now that you recognize these, here is what we do. NOTHING. Sweet, video done. Thanks for waiting for that simple answer. Peace!

Nah, it's not that simple. But what we really do is Nothing. Meaning, we don't put value on the thought or feeling. Choose to not figure it out anymore. Certain things that keep coming back to your mind are things that you commit to not ever figure out. Some choose to have the thoughts come and go. Taking a more mindful approach. While others focus on giving the same response to any thought that arrises. Responses like, "thanks for the thought." "Sure" "okay" "I guess so" "maybe, maybe not." "Sweet" "totally" - these responses can teach the brain that you're simply not giving them any power.

You're treating them with no value. The anxiety and urge to do the mental compulsion will still be there, but overtime it slowly decreases. Just like a crying child asking for something. As time passes and you've ignored the request, they stop. Some are quicker than others. Some children are stubborn. Thoughts could last a few minutes or hours. But, see this time reduce overtime.

Don't get caught up in the "but I'm still having thoughts, so it's not working." Remind yourself that your goal isn't to remove thoughts. It's to change your response to them. Working means, you've not given them value.

So take an inventory of your mental compulsions and get really good at recognizing them. I have a worksheet that helps you through this process and to create a plan to slay your OCD in my Master your OCD course. I'll link that down in the description.

Also to gain the upper hand, go watch this video here to help you get one step ahead of your OCD once and for all.